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Serial Killer Cleared of All Charges after Saying 3 Hail Mary’s

Brett Pinkly. A name that sparks fear everywhere, especially in Hertfordshire - the county in which he committed all of his brutal murders. Pinkly tortured his victims before killing them, and received a life sentence in prison, of which he has currently served two months.


In a shocking turn of events, Pinkly is being released this week after intervention from the Catholic Church. He was permitted by the prison warden to be visited by a priest, so that he could perform the Sacrament of Penance and confess his sins.


Father Desmond Richards said Pinkly had been fully absolved of his heinous crimes, after fulfilling the priest's prayer recommendations.


“I have a little table showing which sins correspond to which prayers. I must admit I feel I was a bit harsh on Brett. Usually for murder I give 2 Hail Mary’s, but in the heat of the moment I thought maybe serial killings deserved an extra one on top.”


Detective Lucian Crothers, who had dedicated most of his life to catching Pinkly, was less than pleased.


“I spent 6 years undercover trying to get to that bastard. I witnessed my partner get slaughtered by Pinkly’s older brother. I just feel like he got off easy. There should’ve been at least two Our Father’s in there. Or a lesser known prayer that he has to look up first.”


Families of the victims are yet to comment, but there’s no doubt they’ll feel justice has been done here, and hopefully they too can forgive Pinkly’s sins.



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