Today marked a groundbreaking day in British environmental history as thousands of children took to the streets to voice concerns and call for change in the policies being adopted towards climate change. This would be a noble pursuit, if it wasn't populated by huge numbers of hypocrites merely seeking to look good!
Whilst many beseeching the government to change it's waste policies only recycle once or twice a week, none are more spineless than Jimmy Jenkins.
A short, rotund boy who had the audacity to complain about oil leaks whilst wearing a pacemaker covered in oil-derived plastic! This complete hypocrisy astounded those who were told about it, with one passer-by clearly baffled Jimmy's stupidity exclaiming: "What the fuck kind of criticism is that? He needs it to live?"
Other culprits included a boy who wants to save wildlife but who kills malarial mosquitoes and and a passionate defender of the arctic from shale gas companies who regularly lets ice melt in his drinks. When will these tree-huggers learn?!