Members of the radical group Greenpeace launched a raid into the Natural History Museum this morning, with a force not felt in London since the SAS shot up the Israeli Embassy in 1980.
“This beautiful creature held in captivity for over 130 years is now finally free,” said ski-masked Greenpeace member Sarah Essen. “Nothing, inanimate object or otherwise, should have to live its life on display, which is why we also freed Katie Holmes from a bamboo cage devised by Tom Cruise back in 2012."
Within immediate release of 'Hope' from a stolen chinook into the Thames ‘Bin Laden’ style, it crushed a speedboat full of tourists 'Jack Shepherd' style to the brief embarrassment of Greenpeace.
Sarah Essen brushed off the incident, arguing that: "We as an organisation must live up to the promise of this young whale's name and 'Hope' for a better tomorrow, in which we don't find ourselves being sued for manslaughter and theft of MOD equipment. Regardless, a good deed was done today and for that we are glad. Good luck Hope!"