Eric Prydz has always been famed for his live shows, which feature realistic holograms with the potential to blow your mind. In his new show, Prydz climaxes with a hologram fully depicting the experience of gazing into the Ark of the Covenant, as shown in the Indiana Jones movie.
None have survived the first few shows on the tour, but we did receive rave reviews from the gently steaming carcasses we interviewed, who still had both thumbs up.
However, it remains unclear whether this was because they enjoyed the show, or because they were trying to use their hands to protect their face from the flashing maelstrom of death that the French house DJ had unleashed.
Musicologists have said that the warning signs were present, given that Prydz's last press statement was taken on a Nokia 2005 Phone, and featured Prydz ranting: "MY NAME IS PRYDZ, KING OF KINGDZ; LOOK ON MY BEATS, YE MIGHTY, AND DESNARE! ICH WÜRDE ALLEIN SEIN ALLEIN SEIN ALLEIN SEIN."
Eric Prydz’s whereabouts remain unknown at the present time, but it is clear that he has gazed into the vortex and lived, presumably making him omnipotent.
At this time, with the very real threat that he might transform everything inside this dimension into a snare drum, we’d recommend that everyone stays inside and offers Prydz various blood sacrifices to the beat of 'Call On Me'.
