Wow! This Remake of Oliver Sees Him Running a Successful Funeral Business

When visionary director Martin Scorsese said he wanted to reboot hit musical Oliver, many were sceptical. However, with the advance screening last night, it has emerged a triumph.

In Scorsese’s latest masterpiece, Oliver remains at the undertakers, ultimately emerging as the head of a thriving funeral business, which will dig many of its competitors graves.

Powerful scenes emerge where Oliver earns a small pay rise after filing the company’s paperwork diligently, and when Nancy comes in to arrange the funeral of Bill Sykes after he dies of coronary failure.

But there’s no way Scorsese would forget that Oliver made its name as a musical, and the songs are what complete this piece of cinematic genius. Songs cleverly riff on the original, with numbers like “Got Four More Plague Bodies This Week” playing on “Who Will Buy This Beautiful Morning?”

Future reboots include Batman: The Dark Knight’s Portfolio, where Bruce Wayne chooses not to undermine the fiscal probity of Wayne Enterprises through a series of ostentatious expenditures on bat themed fetish gear, and Lilo and Fido, where Lilo adopts a nice Schnauzer instead of Stitch.

Scorsese returned to vintage advertising for the production.

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